<--- remove that to fix layout GONE FISHING

who wants to see my treenis? (theres a tree growing out of my pube)

Hmmm.. We put this on this thing.. Then take the screw hammer and nail it into my- Oh hi, Didn’t see you there. I was just inventing a new type of invention, One that provides the ultimate pleasre. Please enjoy my blog, I’m shy, yet gay. dont be afraid of me.

Disclaimer: im sad

my spiritual sex adventures + life tips

cool arts

rest in piece you beautiful baby

Sorry homestuck..

drake and jake regular show

my Original poetry



ants and grapes blog

When I was a child I was born in a horrible river and I sailed down the river and landed in a bad jungle The second I landed into the bad jungle I instantly turned old. I looked up and a bike fell out of the clouds and I caught it. I positioned my body on the bike, and I started riding it through the forest. I could hear the yelps of 1 million year old spirits. Deafening my ears instantly. I became panicked and short of breath, all I could see was foliage for miles, the path was made of golden dust. I could feel my lungs inhaling the gold dust as my bicycle kicked it up. I could feel myself changing. Changing into what I am now. It was time to grow into a man and reach for the sky. I had to follow my dreams. Finally I got off the bike and started to dig deep into the path, What I saw changed my life. It was a box, But I couldnt seem to get it open. I tapped on it hard with every ounce of energy I had. I realized it was useless. I decided to give it a final tap and at that moment a note fell out. To open this box, You need to search for the meaning of your life, for this is the key to your dreams and all your efforts.

I’m searching for my purpose, I’ve been searching for my purpose all of my life. On the earth there are so many wonderful places to dig. But if you dont know where to dig, All you will find is dirt.

i want to put a bluetooth in my butt so god can hear my farts

thanks for supporting my blong

30mins left torblog mything before i leave forever

You're the reason I log in to tumblr every day. Don't fuck this up.

*tears streaming down my face*

if this post reaches 100 notes in 1 hour izzetheking will be recontinued as of 2014

REblog/ like if you arent anti izze

You have until 9:30 MST to show the king that you care

Izzetheking has been discontinued for your convenience.



sex with my lady is perfect.

can i se eyour lady

spongebob's parents are cookies, i thought that too. but they're like old, dried up sponges :)

fuck you dipshut